In this month's editorial , PHS Founder and Editor Trish Wylie, talks about her new resolution for 2018 and her mantra of #ASmileADaythe season of giving and how you shouldn't forget to place yourself on the gift list...
Warning: There are cuss words in this editorial. And yes, I considered taking them out. But they’re kinda necessary to make my point. Read on and you’ll discover why…
A world of possibilities is presented to us with a brand, shiny new year. Many of us vow this year we will do better, live better, be better. This could be the year we’ve been waiting for and we’re ready to grasp those possibilities in both hands and make the most of them. Yay for 2018!
Unfortunately, as we all know, the optimism that accompanies the arrival of a new year can be hard to maintain for twelve months, particularly when it feels like life is constantly grinding you down.
There is a growing movement of people who firmly believe it helps to remember we only have a limited number of fucks to give. You may have seen the posts on Social Media. You may even have read ‘motivational’ books on the subject. But just in case you haven’t, let me explain.
These people say we should use our fucks sparingly before they run out and we discover we have no more fucks left to give. We should care less because, that way, we won’t be disappointed or get hurt. You should look after yourself, deal with your own shit and let everyone else to deal with theirs, then there will be less heartache and pain.
It’s an ethos for life founded on the theory ‘less is more’ and as someone who has preached about finding joy in little things and believes every baby step counts but, at the same time, has experienced the agony associated with caring about things that don’t matter, I should be the ideal candidate for this new wave of thinking.
Now, don’t get me wrong, I do think it’s important to look after your mental health and find ways of coping with stress. I also think leaving some folks to deal with their own shit, especially if they suck the joy out of your day and surround you with negativity, is a survival skill we all need to learn. But in a world filled with negativity, isolation, segregation and division, shouldn’t we all be giving more fucks than less?
If you’re reading this, presumably you are part of the romance reading/writing community or, like us, believe in the power of positivity. After all, ours is a genre founded on hope, which believes it is possible to overcome adversity, conquer fear and find your own version of happily-ever-after.
Members of our tribe are thinkers and dreamers, philosophers and poets, intelligent and empathetic. We give a shitload of fucks about various things and aren’t afraid to say so and We. Are. Many. The number of fucks we can give may not be infinite, but if we all gave a few more of them think of the difference we could make! And by focusing on the positives, we may even manage to hold on to that new year optimism for longer.
So, here’s my resolution for 2018. I am going to give a minimum of one fuck per day for the entire year.
That’s 365 fucks.
Some days, it may only be a small fuck but that’s Okay, cos every fuck counts. The aim is to make someone smile or give them a brief flicker of the same hope we experience when we turn the last page of a romance novel. I could pay for a coffee for the next person in line at my favourite coffee shop or smile at a cashier in a supermarket or put my change in a charity tin or offer to beta-read for a newbie author or comment on the weather to a stranger on a train.
And I will share a selection of the fucks I have given on Social Media throughout the year using #ASmileADay.
Feel free to join me. And Happy New Year!
Trish's latest book is Mostly Married and it is currently FREE for a limited time! To keep up to date with what she's doing you can visit her website or follow her on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram.